Yesterday, I did something that I have never done in my entire life: I bought coffee from a vending machine. It was a moment of utter desperation; I was on a studying plateau and was in hopeless need of progression. To ensure future studious development, I decided it would be prudent to engage in caffeine consumption. The only available outlet for caffeine was the vending machine. So, I sashayed over to the machine armed with sheer determination and 70 cents.
I didn’t really know how the coffee vending machine worked. So, I had to take two whacks at it, instead of just one. But the second try, I got it right. The machine dispensed a styrofoam (appalling!) cup. I picked up the cup, but it was empty; I was a bit confused. I put the cup back, hoping for something to happen. The vending machine quietly burst into motion and filled my cup up with coffee. Before tasting this murky liquid, I smelled it: it smelled like muddy water. I didn’t have a good feeling about this and it being in a stryafoam cup had me feeling suspicious. But, I mustered up the courage to take a sip. It was absolutely the foulest, vilest, and most-sordid thing I have ever put in my mouth (and I once sampled paper as a child). It was even worse than instant coffee crystals. I didn’t know coffee could get worse than coffee crystals. But let me tell you, it does.
However, I can now boast and say “Hey guess what?” what? “I got a crappy cup of coffee for 70 cents.” I guess you get what you pay for. But next time, I think I shall fork out he extra buck for an enjoyable cup o’ steamin joe.
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